What do you want to be when you grow up? Did you ask that question of yourself as a child? Do you ask it still? I find myself asking that question often or at least thinking about it. I often dream of what I could be or who I would like to be. I dream of being a man of God like David or Moses. Men who were sold out for God. Men who were passionate about the creator of the universe. I dream of life somehow changing me into a man who lives in the Word and on his knees day and night. I think about a day when people will come to me for wisdom and guidance because I am known to be connected to the great Counselor. I often think of such things and wonder what I will be molded into when I grow up. Am I alone in this fantasizing? Am I the only one who dreams that life experience will mold me into a better person and better Christian?

This past year has been one of awakening to a horrible reality. My life has been one of looking to the future. I have been labeled or given myself the label of "potential" for far too long. This past year I have learned that "I have grown up" and all my hopes and dreams for adulthood have not happened like planned in my wondering thoughts. I am discontent with who I am as a follower of Christ. I find myself asking "what happened to all my potential?" I thought I would be something special by growing up. The reality is I have tried to rely on fate to change me instead of changing my fate. I have left the responsibility of becoming a man after God's heart up to the worldly experiences and have not taken the initiative to be a passionate pursuer of God. There is a line from the movie "without a paddle" that says "you can lose all your money and work hard and make it all back, but when you lose your time, you never get it back." What a nugget of truth in such a stupid movie.

I have come to the point this week where I am fed up with being half-hearted. I am sick of looking to potential without experiencing progress. I have wasted time that will never be made up. Today I become a man. Today I grow up. Not because time passes, but because I am choosing to live like the name to which I have been called. I will work ever hour to try to uphold my identity as a follower of Christ. There is no potential in me, only Christ. I will no longer ask the question of who I want to be when I grow up, but who am I going to be today. I encourage you, if you hold to the name of Christian, to ask such questions of yourself.
Always remember 2 Corinthians 5:17 (look it up)